Thursday, December 1, 2005

Archives- December 2005

The Notable People of 2005 That Miu von Furstenberg Would Love To  Slap.
Where to begin this year?

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Tom Cruise . My perception of Tom Cruise and couches (I am no longer able to nap on a couch) has been totally altered since he went off his meds vitamins on Oprah . I'm sure by the end of 2006 he will have healed the world with his bare hands. Am I being too glib?

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Katie Holmes . How did a "good Catholic girl" end up becoming a Scientologist-Tom Cruise Spawn Carrying-A Lister overnight? Butt loads of cash.

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Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey . What did the world get out of the separation and future divorce? Fish lips. No thanks.

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Paris Hilton / Paris Latsis / Stavros Nirachos / Mary-Kate Olsen . Go away.
All of you.

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Michael Jackson . He was acquitted and moved to the Middle East, but the wearing the pajamas to court wardrobe, is still etched in our brains.

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Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown . Hell to the yes.

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Kenny Chesney . Just come out and play with the big boys.

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Michael Brown . Katrina . Katrina. Michael Brown. The bitch one.


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Star Jones and Al Reynolds . I'm glad someone with such a self-inflated ego has finally found someone worthy of her love. She hates the gays, but married one? I just don't get it.

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Lindsay Lohan . Boobs. No boobs. Skinny. Not so skinny. Drunk. Not drunk.
Pick one and stay with it.

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Judith Miller . Unfortunately they forgot to throw away the key when she was thrown in jail.
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Russell Crowe . If only that one toss of a phone had actually got him barred from working in the U.S., I wouldn't have to slap him.
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Sienna Miller . I implore you to hire a new stylist, and a life coach.
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Corey Clark . Just one sad individual.

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Dennis Rodman . Why oh why did you have to appear in drag at a Chicago book signing. (This one is for me.)
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Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner - only for their Starbucks consumption.


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Britney Spears and Kevin Federline . Just when we thought Brit was finally going to dump her baby's daddy and poor excuse for a human being husband, she doesn't follow through. The world is saddened by this.

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Eva Longoria . Some air needs to be let out of this one before she explodes.

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Nicole Richie . Eeeeeeeaaaaaat! I'd slap her just hard enough so those horrendous sunglasses would fly off of her head.

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Anna Nicole Smith . She's thin again, but still as vapid as ever.
Honorable mention (Not worthy of a full BS) - Jennifer Aniston & Vince Vaughn (Eww),
Those whose antics made up giddy with delight throughout the year: Tara Reid, Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie (and children), Anderson Cooper, Janet Jackson, Ryan Phillippe, Peter Braunstein , and the gays of Project Runway .
December 23

Royal Tennenbottoms

Courtesy of Gizmodo:

Royal Tennenbottoms

Are you a toilet poweruser? Do you eat chili twice a day just to get your
scat on? Then maybe this toilet seat will appeal to you. Newcomer Brondell
has created a $549 toilet seat with shitloads (teehee) of features. Heated
seat, washing mechanism to clean your rear, warm-air dry, and remote
control are some of the nicer ones. Don't have that kind of cash laying
around? You can still warm your ass for the modest price of $429, but I say
you go DIY and duct tape a bunch of heating pads to your K- Mart brand
seat. Sure it'll get messy, but you'll still have some dough in your

December 21

MTA Transit Strike

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Today's Peeve:
The TWU strike!
As someone who works in the medical field, I cannot begin to fully express my disgust with those on strike right now. Patients are unable to make it to the hospital to receive much needed, critical treatment except to bear the extreme cold weather which will make them even sicker. Meanwhile, on TV a transit worker tells me that he is striking for a dollar raise on his $33 per hour pay. They are striking, not because they have not received their pay, but because they want an increase. Don't we all? Can you imagine if all healthcare professionals went on strike to protest the unfair reimbursement rates of the insurance companies?
Unfortunately, Roger Toussaint:
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will be known not as the union leader who got the workers what they wanted, but as the man who caused mayhem in the city of New York:

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Here's some food for thought; in the last 10 years, just about every major mishap that has occured especially in New York has been (for the most part) unavoidable- the blackout in 2003, the terrorist attacks, the hurricanes and floods, etc. This is the first major event that could completely have been avoided, if even for the compassion that everyone in NYC would probably not mind a little money in their pocket- but this strike is actually causing people who make less money than the transit workers to lose wages.
December 19

"Die Hiltons"

According to this German magazine, I am not the only one with these

En Garde!

Here's a gem from it just me that can't stop laughing every
time I read this?

En Garde! The Safe Bedside Table

Let's get all hypothetical for a second. Pretend you're sleeping at home
and some dude breaks in and is going to rob you/kill you. How will you
defend yourself quickly? Enter the Safe Bedside Table, a genius creation
from designer James McAdam. What looks like a simple, basic table at first,
quickly becomes a shield and sword ready for your defense. We're talking
King Arthur style though, because you'll be greeted with a medieval-style
shield and wooden club to ward off attackers. No sharp swords or maces
here. Remember to call 911 also before you start screaming things like
"Have at you, blackguard!" The whole thing is made of cherry and steel so
it won't look hideous either.

Product Page


December 16

Accept (No) Substitutions!

Once you begin to approach a state of total Zen with your Treo, you begin to look for ways to trim the fat and get rid of applications you really
don't use while looking deeper at the ones you do. Yesterday I shared my glee at QuickNews now supporting images. For me, images in splendid vivid colors are part of the most important features an application can offer me ( the others being wireless capability, desktop component, one-handed navigation and size). Seeing what a difference that made to QuickNews made me re-evaluate some of my other choices.

                              PocketTV Browser

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Before PTVB I was an avid user of SecondScreenTV. SSTV is free and quite easy to use. However I could not get past the huge advertisements that occupied the bottom half of the screen. In addition, SSTV would only give 3 days worth of data no matter what I tried.
PTVB gives me several functions and options that I love but the one that I
enjoy the most is the ability to add program reminders to my calendar. As a person who lives on Tivo, I can grab my Treo and use the find feature to locate any occurence of the word channel. This pulls up all the entries in
my datebook that have been placed by PTVB.
In addition, everything is wiki-based. I can tap on the name of an actor in
one movie and the system will scour its database and return a list of every
movie or show he/she is featured in.


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This is my latest acquisition and I am really quite pleased with it,
especially as it is freeware. ST was an old PQA (Palm Query Application)
that has been around since 2001. Of all the now-defunct PQAs, someone had a brilliant idea to revive this and modify it for use on OS5.
The most complex part of Showtimes is gathering all the current files to
allow you to run the script. If this all sounds like Greek to you, don't
worry... In the next few days I plan to write up a step by step wiki to
help even the least computer savvy figure it out.
The resulting data is an extremely organized listing of movies, theatres
and synopsis that allow for quick and easy reading. And although no 5way nav compatible, its still easy enough that one could use even a beefy
finger to acheive results :).


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Another great sleeper that I had neglected because I was using Leonard
Maltin's Movie Guide. Well some financial wizard over at LMMG decided to
tack on a charge to upgrade to the 2006 guide. I cannot fathom spending $10
a year for Leonards app so I took a closer look at VideoHound.
I am probably not the only person who failed to realize that you can attach
your own jpgs to the movie descriptions for a completely rich experience.
In addition to doing this for a couple of movies, I also invested in a
couple of the pix packs that they offer on their website.
In addition to images, VideoHound also has a number of sound files that
attach to each movie. So in the description for 'Scarface' I can opt to
hear him say the infamous line "Say hello to my leetle friend!".

I have been though Vindigo and Handmark Express but these options are much

Express Movies (19.99/year) = Showtimes (free)

Express News = QuickNews (1 time pmt)

SecondScreenTV(free) = Pocket TV Browser (using free XMTV listings you only pay 1 time for the app-well worth the charge)

Leonard Maltin Movie Guide (yearly upgrade fee) = VideoHound (1 time fee)

Express Maps & 411 ($29.99/year) = Directory Assistant (free)

Express Weather ($19.99/year)= 4cast ($9.95 1 time fee)

Express Stocks ($29.99/year) = Stockbroker Standard ($19.95 1 time fee)

December 15

Hurray for Quick News!

A number of weeks ago I wrote about my favorite RSS reader Quicknews...and I'm thrilled to say that Quicknews now supports inline images! Combined with its support for large feeds, in my opinion Quicknews is now an excellent replacement for AvantGo, Handmark Express News and Isilo...provided you find the right feed.

Below is a screenshot of QuickNews as it displays the feed for TVGasm. It
took me about 2 hours of experimenting to come up with a collection of
feeds that give the 'full story' and not just a teaser to lure you to their
site, as well as those that actually provide images in their feeds. Some of
my favorites are: Defamer, TVGasm, A Socialite's Life, The Gadgeteer and
PDA Today.

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Here are some helpful pointers that I used when setting up QuickNews:

1. Be sure to mark the option to store feeds and cache on your memory card.
2. Once you have selected that option, raise your cache limit to about
10MB. At first I was worried about this but I realized that the QuickNews
cache is totally different from my Treo's regular dbcache.
3. Set your auto updates for when you aren't going to need your Treo for at least 15 minutes. Mine is set for 5am.

December 14

Take That, Santa!

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December 13

Overheard in NY excerpt...

Overheard in NY
New York Does Not Do Hyphenation, Douche

Guy: I'm a NyLon.
Girl: A what?
Guy: A NyLon. New York-Londoner. Girl: Oh, well, I'm a NoInt.
Guy: NoInt?
Girl: Yeah, Not Interested.

--Union Square

Overheard by: Lucy Stone

Treo Perfection Update!

Its been over 8 months since I shared the secret of my Treo success. Here's an update on what I've changed in my setup. My current free space is 36% (8MB):

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1. Upgraded to 1.23 1.43and made a Custom ROM to include Agendus 10, Snappermail, Filez, Handzipper and Hi-Launcher. Less items in the custom ROM gives you more ‘processor’ memory.

2. Installed Launcher X, using the nav-button fix posted in another section of this forum.

Now use ZLauncher

3. Used LauncherX to move SmartList, SplashID, iSilo,SplashMoney and Healthfile (leaving a 'shortcut' in main memory) to allow them to sync to their desktop components.

Have these now in main memory

4. Have the following apps installed in Main Memory:

-Vindigo (edit: now deleted) Still Deleted

-AvantGo (I still use this in case I don't have a chance to convert on iSilo) Now deleted
-BackUpBuddy Pro Now use BackupMan
-Card Export (any time I use an external card reader, my data seems to get corrupt when I   put the card back into my Treo)
-Dataviz Tech (to move Doc to Go components to SD Card)
-Fonts4OS5 (with Times Roman 22 font)
-Directory Assistant
-Documents to Go
-KeyCaps 600
-Leonard Maltin Movie Guide

-Power-Up Use radioState instead
-SplashPhoto Use GrxView Pro- smaller footprint, uses native folders
-TCPMP (the new freeware Movie Player) moved to card with powerRun
-Uninstall Manager
-Verichat Use Chatopus instead

-2Action Meeting 3
- Bonsai
-Idea Pad
-PocketTV Browser

5. I have the following apps on my 2GB SD card using PowerRun:

-3D Hockey
-Abidia Wireless
-Acid Solitaire
-Acid Spider
-Bejeweled 2
-Big Two
-Book Worm
-Bowling Deluxe
-Emperor's Mahjong
-Exact II
-Fish Tycoon
-Flight Status
-Futile Feudal
-GTS Racing
-Hold em High
-Idea Pad
-InHand (Handango Catolog)
-JT Wheel of Fortune
-Lemondae Tycoon
-Little Palm Pet
-Love Game
-MMPlayer (I still keep it, even though I use TCPMP)
-Mars Needs Cows
-Mobile DB (for the 'On-the-Fly' db lookup function)
-Monte Carlo
-NoviiAnimator (I tend to also use this for regular sketches/notes)
-Pac Dude 100
-Plant Tycoon
-Poker Game
-Rats & Spears
-RB Tapper
-Sea War MP
-Seven Seas
-Siberian Strike
-Space Trader
-Splash Blog
-Teal Auto
-Tennis Addict
-Tetri Attack
-Tip Assist
-Travel Deluxe
-Visit it
-Volley Balley
-Warfare Incorporated
-Woman PLus
(edit:All apps above listed at PalmGear)
All games now moved to Palm/Launcher folder to save shortcut space. Cut down games to 75 now!

6. I have the following installed directly to my SD Card using the /Launcher folder:

-3V Broomsticks
-Nexus Dictionary
-Navigator Deluxe
December 12

Breast Transportation

I can only imagine what Scar-J must have gone through in this dress.                                   Image hosted by

 But I am extremely sympathetic to the fact that she wanted to avoid looking like the next chick. She was the one in 'My Girl' with Macaulay.

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Ladies, somewhere between these two is the proper way to transport your
breasts.... Please.

December 08

Crackhead Alert

All the time I used to watch the Chappelle Show, I thought his crackhead
character was just an exaggeration...until just today.
I got onto the train and was immediately accosted by what can only be
described as an odor so horrific that it threatens to relieve me of every
meal I've ever had since childhood. At first I thought it was coming from
the homeless man who was sprawled out across 3 seats, asleep. But after
sitting for a while I realized that I would die if I had to endure that
smell any longer. I had moved towards the door, planning to switch cars
when I suddenly noticed that much to my shock and horror the smell was
actually getting worse! A quick visual scan of the area revealed a
character that was an exact match to the Chappelle show character- right
down to the 'powdered donut' ring around his nose and mouth.
Who sees this and decides "Yeah, this dude is who I most want to resemble!
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                                       Pass the crack pipe!"
December 05

Den Remodeling

Ever since we moved into our new home some 5 months ago it has bothered me that we never did up our den. When we first moved in we got a futon from K-mart and put a tv in there but that has pretty much been it. In the days when I was smoking the den became my unofficial smoking room.
Then over the summer we had my family over and this was the room we made up for my mother.And then...nothing. Every now and then I'd hang out in there while folding laundry, or Dean would watch a football game as he worked in the garage but that was the extent of it.
When the holiday season rolled around and we went to get our decorations we ended up with one extra huge bow which I decided to affix to the curtain in the den. Suddenly seeing that bright red in the room made me realize that it was a lack of color that had made the room so drab.
So, off to Target we went where I decided I would make the den a cozy room to hang out in, rather than just a perpetually closed door. At Target I decided to go for a ruby-red color in the room. We picked out a twin
bedsheet set for about $8, a set of tab curtains for about $14 and a throw
pillow and matching throw.The dorm-room grey futon is now a lively red (wrapped in the sheet set) and the rug on the floor ($149) really brings it all together. This is an excellent way to decorate a room which is not really part of the central focus of the house.

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